Isn’t it nice to go to bed early every now and then? Life in general and work specifically can be so tiring and sometimes you just need some extra sleep. Or just some time to relax in a freshly made duvet with a good book and maybe even a nice man to hug and cuddle.
That was me last week. Our three week holiday to Scandinavia is due soon, but both Matt and I are afraid that we won’t make it. We are so tired that we fear we probably will have collapsed right before our estimated time of departure.
Considering our increasing fatigue, it was nice to have a proper night sleep for once. It was only just 10 o’clock and we would have all the time we could dream of to, err, dream and enjoy a fresh and new us in the morning. But then…
Zzzzzzz
“Matt, I hear a mosquito…”
“Just pretend you don’t hear it, it will go aw-autsch! Damn, it bit me!”
Lights go on, as does Matt’s killer instinct.
Armed with one of his boxer shorts he has fished out of the dirty laundry, he screens the walls of our bedroom. Suddenly he lashes out: there’s blood on the wall and Matt picks the dead body of the insect of his shorts.
“Ha, that will teach it. Now let’s go back to sleep.”
Thus happens, as Matt can actually fall asleep in two seconds. I can’t. I usually have to wait patiently for at least half an hour before sleep dares to catch me. Therefore I was still awake when I heard something approaching my ear…
Zzzzzzz
“Matt! Mosquito again!”
I shake Matt awake and order him to rescue me and my sleep once more. And he does.
Zzzzzzz
And again.
Zzzzzzz
And again.
“I don’t care if you suck my blood, damn insect, but could you at least shut the fuck up?!”
At this point it’s 1 o’clock in the morning and both Matt and I are going crazy. A few mosquitoes don’t scare us, but this year they are everywhere! We don’t know where they could all be coming from. Matt is accusing our neighbours. He thinks one of them probably has a pond in the garden without fish, thus causing so many mosquitoes. I ponder a bit about global warming. But in the end we don’t really care. We just want to sleep. And finally we did.
The next day we got ourselves some handy wire netting to create an insect screen for the window of our bedroom. To do things properly we (Matt) hermetically sealed not only our bedroom, but our whole house with it.
“Ha, no mosquito will ever come through this!” Matt smirked pleased with himself.
That night we were just about to go to sleep. Just about to turn of the light, close our eyes and doze off. Just about.
Zzzzzzz
“What the fuck?!”
“That is impossible!”
The amount of mosquitoes had drastically decreased due to our insect screen, but one or two are definitely still too many. So again, Matt had to tiptoe through the room, helped by my eyes scanning the walls, the curtains, the bed and the closets.
“Pff, I do need our vacation, love, glad we’re going in two weeks time,” I pout wearily.
“Yes, well, you do know what Scandinavia is famous for right?”
“I dunno, cardboard crackers and forests and lakes and fjords, I suppose…”
“And something else…”
“…”
“Mosquitoes…”
“Fuck.”
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How awful! It’s Daddy Long Legs (Crane Flies) that are the bane of my existence. Perhaps a bit too early for them as yet, but give it a few weeks and I’ll be going crazy running round my room after the blighters.
Left by London-Lass on Monday, June 23rd, 2008